Okay so if you read my previous/first post you will know that 2016 was hardly a good year. However 2017 has already been fairly decent, which is more than I can say for this time last year. So lemme tell you why...
So, even if I take into account that I had the stress of an exam and an assignment for college, I am in a good place right now. I got invited for an interview at one of the best universities in England for my course. Not only that but I have 3 conditional offers for awesome unis too. And I got a distinction for my first English assignment. So on the educational side of things, I am happy because it is going phenomenally better than I expected.
And my new job is going really well; my manager is awesome and the people I work with are actually decent people. I feel comfortable there and not like I'm under constant scrutiny. Plus I get to drink as much Yorkshire Tea as I want!
It's been difficult now that my counselling has finished because I don't have the weekly reassurance that I would prefer to have. However it is nice to be able to cope with things more and have the tools to do so. I still loath myself and am depressed and anxious 24/7 but I'm working on it.
I have come to the realisation that I identify with a "religion" (if it can be called so). And that "religion" is animism. I won't go into detail here but here's a link if you wanna check it out: http://www.religionfacts.com/animism. I personally wouldn't call it a religion but a belief nonetheless.
Tonight I got a random phone call from an unknown number. Usually I don't answer the phone when that happens but something made me do so tonight. And I'm really glad that I did because it was an old friend of mine. Though I think 'friend' is an understatement. We basically grew up together and were like brothers. But you know how it is, after school people grow apart. And we just sort of chilled for a bit and had a catch up. It was really nice.
I honestly feel more motivated now than I ever have done and it's a really nice feeling. I am doing me and it's empowering. I finally reached a place where I'm doing what I want to do with my life rather than doing things because society/my family say I should do. I fell liberated!
So, to conclude my random/ seemingly pointless post, I am happy and 2017 is off to a good start... I am excited for the year to come. I will sign off with a picture that expresses my cautious optimism...
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